yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
