it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
