roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
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