that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize