dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
