omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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