You can't special order awesome
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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