I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Randomize
