Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
