I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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