Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
