i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
i've created a new STD.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
