i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
