Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Randomize
