we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
