I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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