even my farts smell like vagina
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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