so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize
