my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
