margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize