In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
