i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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