escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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