C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
