The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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