she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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