He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
