physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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