He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
