He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
