It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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