I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
you never un-have a 4some
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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