You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
