just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
