ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
