Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
