I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
