you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Randomize
