We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
try to milk me bitch
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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