How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
