I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
kristin has been a bad kristin
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize