went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
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