I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
