We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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