Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
