fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
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