I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
organizing the empties. That sober.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
