Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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