you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
