Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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