Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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